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When me and Mistress first were married we were very much in love with masturbation. Although we didn’t really call it that. We kind of thought of it as an alternative to sex. We were very much afraid of true sex and the consequences that follow it. I think we were smarter than the average bear! We were able to finely hone our skills. By the time we got around to actual penetration we knew each others bodies very well.

Lately however we have moved to having regular sex almost exclusively. Masturbation, and masturbating each other has kind of been left off the table. I miss it! I find that sex can be more intense and last longer when moved from the ‘penis in vagina’ mode and into the, touch it over here, stick it in there, rub against that, mode.

As time goes by I’m learning that I have a bit of a fetish for masturbation. I know I love to watch Mistress. I also know I love all the other combinations of masturbation, her doing it to me, me doing to me etc. There are a ton of interesting message boards, books, and sites dedicated to it. Mistress enjoys reading about masturbation as well. I think she is also kind of into it. I know she has been digging around on the Ivillage boards reading about it.

I think I’m going to make an attempt to bring back some of the old masturbation spark.

Imagine your walking down a trail.  Deep in the woods.  You get that urge, you know the kind, the urge to have your woman grab the nearest tree, bend over, and allow you to ravish her from behind.  Or perhaps the urge is to find a nice secluded spot and watch as she masturbates in the sun.  I think long walks on wooded trails are so romantic that I cant help but have these thoughts.

Now the big question is, what is the best way to make this scene possible?  I’ve found that there are very few wooded trails that are remote enough to just whip it out and get going.  Is it safe enough to just wander off the trail and find a nice large tree to hide behind?  Or maybe you need a low lying spot that can’t be seen from the trail, a ditch if you will.  Maybe a large patch of undergrowth that is concealing.  Let’s assume you find this tree/ditch/bush and get busy, if someone spots you from the trail, maybe they spot the pale whiteness of your rear.  What will they do?  The odds of them actually figuring out whats going on is slim.  Maybe they see some movement and color and say, ‘hum, someone back in the woods…I’m to lazy to investigate.’  I mean why would they investigate?

Lets pretend they did investigate.  Your there, keeping a watchful eye out.  You see someone walking along the path.  You are several hundred feet off the path, and there are a multitude of trees and bushes between you and the trail.  They stop, point and begin walking over.  By the time they arrive you have zipped up, covered up and are lying serenely under the canopy staring up at the trees.  You prop yourself up on your elbow, look at them and say, ‘may I help you?’  They blush, turn around and promptly walk back to the trail, muttering something about thinking they saw something.

I think I may have to make this scene happen.  What do you think Mistress?

Mistress and I spent a lovely weekend camping. Camping is a very loaded word. I mean when you have the ability to make brownies, have a microwave, air conditioning, and running water, is it really camping?

On a normal holiday trip I usually have ample material for this blog. Unfortunately this particular trip did not allow for ANY sex. That is very strange for us.

We slept in the ‘living room’ of our palatial camper, and thus any sexual activity could be interrupted by the first person to have to hit the bathroom. My good friends would probably not be to excited to walk in on mistress straddling me with her breasts bouncing up and down…

Sometimes while in a camp ground Mistress and I have been able to visit the community showers for a little fun. We’ve been known to both slip into a private shower and recreate a scene often found in our own shower at home. There’s something to be said for doing naughty things and having that remote chance of getting caught. Although someone busting into a shower would be a remote possibility! This trip did not afford such a luxury. The showers were separated by gender. Me in the little boys room, Mistress in the little girls room.

I think I’m going to put in a formal request with Mistress to take a short trip where the only thing we have to do is screw. Going 3 days without is rough, but going 3 days while on vacation is just plain crazy!

Yesterday I wrote about giving and receiving sexual pleasure while cruising down the road. Today I figured I’d write about a lost friend, the pickup truck I sold a few years back.

This truck was the ultimate vehicle for sex on the road. It had a classic bench seat. Acres of pleather just perfect for an outstretched mistress. She could lie on her back, her head pointing to the right hand side of the vehicle, her legs opened toward me. She could lie on her stomach, her head in my lap. This bench seat was so useful that it almost begged for sexual activity.

The ONLY problem with this truck was that it did not have cruise control. This meant that as the sexual energy got turned up, the speed got faster and faster.

I miss my old truck. Someday soon I will replace it. I hope the new one has the same bench seat…

Sex in the car has never been my favorite thing.  It was kind of fun back when me and Mistress were dating, but now it just seems like alot of work.  Now when I say ’sex in a car’ I’m referring to the classic, park the car, lower the seat back, let the missus climb on top and go to town.

Sex while driving down the road is a different story.  This is still one of my favorite things to do.  Of course sex while driving isn’t truly full penetration sex.  Its more of a hands on approach.  Although we have been known to make it an oral affair.

In the store we are selling what we call a ‘travel box.’  This is a glove box sized box which is designed to hold a vibrator or a small dildo.  We also put in cleaning wipes, and lube.  One of the goals of this storage box is to have everything available to you should you feel an urge while on one of those long road trips.  I find Mistress with her pants down around her ankles while we cruise along at 75 miles per hour to be highly erotic.  Of course her hand around my cock is also a very interesting proposition.

We are not really flashers so we do our best to NOT give the weirdos in semi trucks a nice show while doing this.  We’ll cover up or just try to avoid them.  I’m not sure if this is modesty or my complete disdain for truckers.  Probably both.

So is giving and receiving sexual pleasure dangerous while driving down the road?  Yeah probably, but damn is it worth it.  It’s kind of like doing 100 miles per hour.  Its so exhilarating and exciting.  You know if you get caught your going to be in some serious trouble.  If you screw up your in even more trouble.  I have a friend who did just this while driving around a capitol city, in a developing country, in Asia.  I dont know if any of you have ever been to a developing country, but driving in these places is close to suicide, driving while someone sucks on your penis…lets say he survived with no incidents but he’s a braver man than I.  If he can do that, there, we can do it here!
I suggest you give it a try.  Come back here and write about it.  If you’ve already done it, lets here how it went.

The question for today is would you date a girl, or marry a girl who is either interested in other girls, or has at one time been interested in other girls.

I’ve been told that it is a common fact that fewer people have problems dealing with girl on girl than they do guy on guy. I don’t know if this truly a fact but I do know that the thought of two hairy lumpy guys is just kind of gross. But the thought of two soft smooth women is…not gross. My goal isn’t to offend gay guys, its just that girls are so much more appealing than guys.

So the question still stands, how would you as a guy feel about a significant other who is interested in the other sex?

Mistress has no tenancies toward other women. She definitely appreciates how other women look. She is first to point out a sexy person, be it a guy or a girl. Now that I think about it, its more frequently girls than guys. I think that falls back to my earlier point about hair and lumps.

I don’t think it would be all that cool to have a girl who is looking at other girls in that special sort of way. I imagine I’d be constantly wondering if I could please her as well as a woman would. On the other hand I DO like having a woman who appreciates other women. This means we get into some interesting, and erotic conversation.

Mistress: “She’s so cute!”

Me: “Why yes she is”

Mistress: “I love those knockers, they are very nice.”

Me: “ummmm Yes, yes they are. Kind of make me think of yours…”

Mistress: “You mean these?”

And of course I find myself looking at two womens breasts, and enjoying both in a very fun and exciting way.

In order to come up with good topics to write about for this blog I spend quite a bit of time reading sex articles on various web sites. For the most part these articles are lame and don’t discuss much of anything a reasonably intelligent person would care to read. Its a painful process to actually find an interesting article.

Everyone is familiar with the grocery store isle tabloids with the headings ‘10 great ways to get your man to jump over the moon.’ and ‘how to convince him he’s not really a man.’ These magazines offer drivel that help nobody, and often are a repeat of the same crap they pushed out the week/month/year before.
As I read these articles I realize there is a pattern. Almost all of these articles are based around making men look like animals! I know I said this same thing yesterday but I think this needs to be discussed! Look at the blip I pulled from IVillages Love and Sex area, entitled Translating Man Speak: What He is Really Trying To Tell You.

“He says: You’re a really good person
He means: You’ll never see him again”

and

“He says: Let’s be friends
He means: You’re not my type, but could you set me up with your hot friend?”

I’m SO HAPPY all of the morons at IVillage can speak for me! The writer of this drivel isn’t even a guy! So please, ladies? If you read this crap AND believe it, you are destined to have a very lonely life. While there may be guys who think like this, they are not the kind of guys you want to be with. If you run your life with this sort of crap as your guide you will never be able to weed out the guys who say, ‘your a really good person’ and mean ‘your a really good person.’

Just some thoughts. I’ve been the nice guy my whole life. I mean what I say. Crap like this makes it harder to be the nice guy. All the women think its some sort of setup.

I just read an article about the top 10 lies men tell women, concerning sex. For the most part I disagree with the entire article. Most of these “lies” are just thrown together in an attempt to make men look like shallow thoughtless, animals who have never evolved past early primate. However there was one that kind of touched a nerve.

9. I don’t enjoy going to strip joints

I’ve never been to an actual ’strip joint’ however I have spent one long evening at the local topless bar. There were women topless, dancing on the stage, serving drinks and giving private dances in a dark corner. We were there for a bachelor party.

The group of guys I was with (minus the bachelor, I must admit he was thinking the same thing I was) spent the evening standing around the raised stage, cigarettes hanging out of their mouths, cheap (at least cheap anywhere else you buy it) beer in their hands, and a far off retarded look on their faces. Every so often a dancer would mosy on over and the guys would stuff dollar bills in their g-string.

I’m standing there bored out of my mind. Don’t get me wrong I LOVE looking at naked breasts! LOVE IT! But I hate staring at breasts that I cant touch! There was no hope of my beautiful wife coming out the dark, naked and waiting for me to ravish her. So I’m there, staring at these pathetic guys, oggling these women, and I know at home mistress is lying in bed, naked and busy pleasuring herself.

So needless to say I don’t like ’strip joints.’ I do ponder if it would be any more fun if I could talk mistress into going to a strip club with me. However she has shown very little interest in going, so much like staring at naked ladies I cant touch, spending too much time pondering mistress in a strip club brings about very little satisfaction.

I recently read an article on MSNBC about  a guy who went to a sex-toy fair.  He goes into some detail about about how the toys are completely unlike most men alive and could make a man feel, well, inadequate.

I suppose that anyone who wants her partner to feel as good about the toys as she does needs to follow a few simple rules.

1.   Use it as an addition.    Use a vibrator WHILE he’s in you or let him stimulate you with it.   It could also be used as foreplay; you could cum (god-bless multiple orgasms for women) and then ride him until he explodes–literally.
2.   Never, EVER use it and neglect him.    ‘Nuff said.

3.   If he finds it cool, tell him sexy stores about when you use it solo.   Exaggerate a bit if you have to — I know my reality isn’t quite as good as the story I can come up with.
We’ve been successfully and blissfully using toys for years and we’ve come to enjoy their presence as an ADDITION to our sex life.   Do you have any tips for introducing sex toys into your fun?   Feel free to comment and let us all know!